Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Looking into my heritage

Karabeth, when I started thinking about this subject, I automatically thought of you and your zest for all things genealogy. It made me smile.

The Gilbert family is very lucky to have a close family friend who has taken the great task of compiling our family tree. Near the end of my grandmother's time on earth last year, she trusted our family's genealogy paperwork to my Aunt Teela, who then passed it off to her best friend and roommate Jackie for more research. Before my grandmother passed away, I was able to steal a few moments to look at this valuable information. Turns out, our family settled in Jackson, Tennessee after an ancestor who fought in the War of 1812 was given land in return for his time spent in war. Before that, I believe we were settled in the Virginia area. How amazing to see where my ancestors came from!

So from here, I'm eager to find out exactly how long my family has been in the "New World." I'm excited to fill out my Daughters of the American Revolution membership form and claim my heritage. It's like looking into the past and knowing that there's a reason I'm in Tennessee, in the Southeast, in the United States!

Where are you from?

Research, Shlmesearch

1 week, 4 days to go on this journey called college.

Tomorrow night (technically tonight now) I have an 8-10 page paper on the topic of my choosing due. Not to mention I have to take a break to go take a final exam in my Business Policy class. I must keep repeating to myself, breathe it's almost over. Just breathe for goodness sake.

Did I mention I don't enjoy extensive research? I'm not the biggest fan of it for sure. It can sometimes be as bad as getting bored watching the show House M.D. just because I get tired of all the what-if's that arise from all their research. (BTW who knew that so many ailments existed in this world, I'm just sayin') The good thing about my major is I haven't had to write as many research papers as maybe a Biology major would have, but I've done my fair share of "Pick a topic and write about it just so we know you can write" types of papers. My number one pet peeve of college has been the busy work, but I will digress on my pet peeves and other observations of my college experience in the upcoming days.

So that's my story and I'm sticking to it. By the way, in case you were wondering, my topic for this paper is "Older Workers in the American Workforce." This was for an Office Management class, of which the teacher has already said she doesn't enjoy my writing. I stick my tongue out at her.

Let the countdown begin!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

I hate my job

I don't mean my normal 9 to 5 job (but I wouldn't mind having another one of those either). I'm talking about my side job as a caregiver. I usually love it, my patients are almost always someone I've known for a long time or are the family members of someone I've known a long time. I have a connection to them thus I automatically make them one of my family.

But there comes a time in every caregivers life when you realize your patient is not going to be there after your job is done. My patient right now is given a week to live, and her family has to just sit there and wait. My job at night is to sit there and wait for something to happen. And when it does happen, I have to be there when the family gets there. And I have to tell them that everything went peacefully, and that she suffered no pain. I know this process all too well because I've been through it, even with my own family members.

After speaking to one of this lady's precious children, I knew he had no idea what was ahead of him. He's going off what the doctor's say, and he's wise enough to know when to say "no, Mother wouldn't want that, it will just pro-long the inevitable." What he doesn't know is how hard this next week is going to be. I know an approximate time table of the events that are about to unfold for this family, and they are asking me questions about what happens next. How do you tell someone the next step is complete kidney failure, or she's going to go into a coma and be taking her turn towards Heaven? How do you tell 5 grown people that their mother, who has lived 91 wonderful years is suddenly not going to live past a week? Even more weird is when they ask you what they should do next.

I got on the elevator this morning and cried. Because I know how that family member feels and I know their anticipation of something might turn around. I have a great respect for death and the peace that it brings to your body when you've been suffering. You're released from this earth into Heaven, and there has to be no greater joy. My job here on earth is to make your suffering body at least as comfortable as you can be before you're released. There's no greater joy and yet pain to tell your loved one that it's okay, they can go on. I know there's a heaven because I see it through my patients. You see them connecting with some great beyond, and to this day I've never seen anyone frowning as they pass on. Even with faith on your side you have no concept of what Heaven is going to be like, but in my line of work you get to see the reaction of what someone else is seeing as they cross that barrier.

So to be blunt, my job is not bad and I really do enjoy it. But when it comes to times like this, I hate it.

Karabeth and Karen, please send your prayers for Mrs. Ruby Robertson and her family right now.